Sunday, December 30, 2012

Y2 Day 123: My Sweet Baby Denzel

Many years ago (right after Last of the Mohicans) I decided that Daniel Day-Lewis was my spiritual husband. It's not that I found him so cute or handsome, per se, I just loved him. His talent, his charisma, his . . . whatever, I loved him and he was my man.

(Husband is exquisitely understanding. Also, we have a giant framed portrait of his spiritual wife, Anna Netrebko, over our piano, so he has nothing to complain about.)

But you know, there are just so many Hollywood hunks out there, a husband wasn't enough; I also needed a spiritual boyfriend. Enter Denzel Washington.

Daniel and Denzel, whoo-ee! What more could a girl ask for?

But here was the best thing: Even in the hottest fantasy I could imagine, I still ultimately picked Husband. To wit: Daniel greets me at the door of our lovely heated home in Ireland, a glass of cold champagne in one hand, the leash of our teacup piggy in the other. "Darling!" he says, greeting me with a kiss and handing me the bubbly, "great news! Denzel is coming for the weekend! And —"
[wink, wink] — "he feels like sharing!"

[So naughty!!]

So, yes, I might spend a lovely weekend with Daniel and Denzel — but then I would want to come back home to Husband and children. And that was a nice thing to reflect on.

But the years went by and, as happens in so many marriages, Daniel and I grew apart. He made fewer movies that I wanted to see. I felt it was time for a new spiritual husband and possibly a new spiritual boyfriend as well.

Here's who I married:

And here's my boyfriend:

(Brunie's going to squawk at this, she thinks Mark Ruffalo's hers, but she only claimed the Underpants of Desire Mark Ruffalo, i.e., the character from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I claim all the rest of him! and I didn't like that movie anyway.)

I'm thinking of all this tonight because I just saw my sweet baby Denzel in Flight, and he was simply extraordinary. He is so handsome, it's easy to forget that he's also a master actor. Just — brilliant.

(When he starred in Devil In a Blue Dress, during a fight scene, a women in the audience suddenly screamed, "Not the face!!!" Hilarious.) (And understandable.) (Unless you're Mrs. Cynicletary, who actually finds Wesley Snipes more attractive, which is incomprehensible to me. But Mrs. C is an older person, I cut her some slack.)

What a good year my men are having! The Avengers, Lincoln, Les Miserables, and now Flight. I think I'll see at least three of my special four at the Oscars! And given that my sweetie Mark Ruffalo got the very best reviews of any Avenger, is there a tiny chance he'll be there too? Fingers crossed!

Can I pick 'em or what?!

(But Husband is still my #1 choice, always. And soon I will curl up next to him in our nicely vacuumed bedroom, listening to his easy breathing through his new sleep mask. Ah, married life among 50 year olds — it's hot.)

Happy New Year's Eve Eve!

—Lady C

1 comment:

  1. MR. Lady Chardonnay (aka Husband)December 30, 2012 at 10:35 PM

    And, of course, you are my #1 choice, too! Yes, I have Anna over the piano, but that is so totally spiritual. Besides, I cannot even imagine her at 50 looking as hot as you do!!

    ...although I do expect that she will still be singing pretty well....