Thursday, August 8, 2013

Day 69: I Lost a Lot of Weight, But I Think It's In My Back Yard

Hey, want to drop some poundage quickly? Do a ton of yardwork, then a sweaty hour of zumba, and the next day do a ton of yardwork again — that'll do it! I lost a full five pounds.

(Husband says, "I don't ever want to lose weight that badly.")

Of course, then I drank a glass of water and gained at least two pounds back, but nevertheless — it's been tons of fun weighing myself, I do it all day long.

And — oh! the joy! My front garden looks so beautiful! I planted flowers and hung flowering plants and spread black mulch (Li'l Martini helped with this, and he was actually a decent helper! Child labor rocks!), and it is lovely. And my back patio is significantly improved; I pulled a huge leaf bag's worth of weeds, some of them chest-high (I pretty much had my own mighty jungle going on back there, a-weem-a-way, a-weem-a-way), and threw out a pile of broken-down stuff that was holding firewood, and stacked the firewood on some nice shelves that I rescued from a curbside last year, sigh, and put out some beautiful flowers and hung a pretty new windchime.

The one thing I still need to do is figure out my patio cushions. The ones I have are maybe seven years old; I have not taken good care of them, and they are very stained and dirty (though they were lovely back in the day; green and white striped and lushly padded). But they look pretty awful, so I stacked them in front of my house to go out with the trash, and drove to Seasons Four (a local fancy garden store) where I found a beautiful replacement, something like this:

I really loved the pale blue and thought it would be a nice change, so I asked the salesperson what four sets would cost (I need top and bottom cushions for each chair; they are really uncomfortable without them, even with my own glorious natural padding!).

Ha! ha! ha! ha!

"Two-fifty," she said. I said, "Um, total?" She frowned with her eyes and smiled with her lips and said, "Apiece."

Ha! ha! ha! ha!

Then I went: Crap! I have something worth a thousand dollars sitting in front of  my house with the trash!!!

Fortunately, my neighbors have no eye for quality. My stained million-dollar pillows are mine again. It's supposed to be stormy tomorrow morning, but if the sun comes out I will sit in my driveway, sipping sangria, and scrubbing patio cushions with dishwashing liquid. (Recommended for cleaning Sunbrella products, don'tcha know.) Though I will visit Home Depot and Target and the like to see if I can find a more sensibly priced replacement.

It is just such a wonderful feeling to pull into my driveway and be greeted with the sight of a pretty garden, rather than a giant representation of my laziness and sloth. And I really did enjoy the process of making it all look beautiful; I do not know why I put it off for so long.

There are two more garden areas that need some love from me, but they can pass for now. I'm knocking off until after my birthday on Saturday.

Oh! And after a lackluster first day, Mimosa is thoroughly enjoying Rock 'n' Roll Broadway camp! They are doing 10 numbers and she's featured in 7 of them and has some solos, and she's formed tentative friendships with two other girls (today she brought cookies to share with one of them) and seems much happier. That is a huge load off my mind.

And even Husband seems to be getting well, or well-er, anyway — he's still coughing (he will cough forever) but his voice is within 80 percent of normal, and in the immortal words of Jack Nicholson, "That ain't bad."

Tomorrow Mrs. Cynicletary is taking me to lunch, as is our birthday tradition, and it will be such fun! But now I must get my beauty sleep. Hey, I lost five pounds today — I'm exhausted.

Sweet dreams!

Lady C, on her penultimate day of being 50